In the fast-paced world we live in, it’s not uncommon to feel overwhelmed and stuck. Recently, many of our clients come with struggles of low self-esteem, procrastination, and a lack of motivation that had left them unable to complete daily tasks or maintain their professional lives or vocation. These stories deeply resonate with us. We want to offer some insights that might help you and others experiencing similar challenges.

Understanding the Rut

When you’re caught in a cycle of low self-esteem and procrastination, it can feel like there’s no way out. Tasks that once seemed simple become insurmountable. Keeping on top of personal hygiene, socialising with others, and even responding to text messages can feel impossible. These are all mild symptoms of depression, which can be exacerbated by professional or academic pressures, leading to situations like being suspended or terminated from our jobs.

Self-Esteem vs. Self-Confidence

One of the key distinctions we explore in therapy is between self-esteem and self-confidence. Self-confidence is performative; it’s about how we present ourselves to the world and tackle external challenges. It’s the act of being active and engaged in life. On the other hand, self-esteem is internal; it’s about how we value and perceive ourselves deep down.

While boosting self-confidence can help us become more active and engaged, it’s not the whole solution. We also need to address our inner self-esteem. If our internal self-worth is low, no amount of external success will truly satisfy or sustain us. Sometimes, our outer performances break down because the internal foundation is underdeveloped, or because the roles we’ve subscribed to no longer resonate with our true selves.

The Gift of Insight

The breakdown of our performative self can actually be a gift, an insight that prompts us to look inward. It’s a wake-up call reminding us that we can’t simply perform for the duration of our conscious lives without paying attention to our inner lives. This inward gaze, though murky and challenging, is where change can happen.

The Role of Therapy

Therapy provides a safe space to navigate the complex terrain of our inner lives. As therapists, we guide and facilitate this deep discovery. For individuals like the client who reached out, therapy would involve exploring the origins of their reliance on external performance. When did they start believing that their worth was tied to their achievements? Who influenced this belief? How has this perspective impacted their life, and why is it breaking down now?

Through therapy, we aim to help clients reconnect with their inner selves, rebuild their self-esteem, and understand the messages their depression is sending them. It’s about remembering and reclaiming the parts of ourselves that have been overshadowed by external pressures and expectations.

Taking the First Step

If you’re feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or unsure where to start, know that you’re not alone. Reaching out for help is the first step toward rediscovering your inner strength and finding your way back to wellbeing. Therapy is not just about addressing symptoms; it’s about understanding and nurturing the whole self.

Remember that the journey inward, though daunting, is where true transformation begins.

Wellspring Counselling is not a crisis service so if you or someone you know are thinking about suicide please call the Suicide Call Back Service 1300 659 467 or 000 for emergency situations. For emotional distress please call Lifeline 13 11 14, Beyond Blue 1300 22 4636 or Mensline Australia 1300 78 99 78.